FiftyFive

It is that time of year - the spooky time when the full moon is making its way around, autumn is begging winter to take over, the wolves, vampires and ghouls are howling for attention and, we all of us, get a chance to look at the "other" in our lives. Baudillard says the other is never given to us by ourselves but exists only thanks to the fatal declamation of others - which means we are encouraged by others to be "other". I like that thought, it means I have no responsibility for myself but when my ghosts, ghouls and a Hyde personality appears it is the fault of someone other than myself - no wonder I have turned black and white in this picture - and am I smiling or grinning - or is that a grimace - the laughter lingers in the question. Those who encourage me to be other should question their own motivation!

I am currently writing a new piece on "otherness" entitled Dangerous Graces, what might they be? The Three Graces in Greek mythology are the goddesses of joy, charm, and beauty. At the moment I have three parts to the story which seem to make sense:

• Joy Scorned
• Charm Offensive
• Beauty Opposed

What can any of it mean? I can tell you that they are a temptation but in the meantime I think we might listen to something much more benign - but then what is benign about Halloween... hmm? I can't post this VIDEO because embedding has been withheld - so click here for Daddy's Gone - great Glasgow Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uSdQxKaBfU

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A. is now back from Bahrain where she says it was 35C in the shade and well too hot for playing tennis. Nevertheless, she put out three seeds on the way to the semi-finals, only losing out in three sets to an Egyptian girl (No.1 Seed) who could deal with the climate better. A creditable tournament - having also reached the semi-final of the doubles too. In tennis terms, she had already surpassed expectations by beating the seeded players. But this is how tennis matches end. They are unique, like boxing in a way, you spend hours trying to get the better of your opponent then at the end shake hands. And mercifully, there are no egotistical managers and assorted hangers on there to blame the referee et al for their team's failure. Her German opponent here was the No.3 seed and expected to win. In the pictured exchange she apologised to A. at the end of the match, saying her own language cursing was directed at the match and points she was losing, not at A. who has done similar, herself when expected to win. Rairly is aggressive language directed at the opponent - and what is can be forgotten about in the handshake at the end. I love that about sport because like everything we participate in, in life, if you can't lose as well as win what is the point of doing it. Tennis is all about winning and losing, not just winning and winning. Which brings me to one of the funniest losing gestures I have ever seen. I stick a clip on the page here but you have to access it through the link - called John Terry's hilarious tantrum: http://www.bigfooty.com/forum/showthread.php?p=16084540 - Chelsea are playing Aston Villa in the Premier League and after Villa score the equalising goal, John Terry, the England Captain can be seen jumping on the spot in frustration. As the BBC described it: "John Terry reacted by jumping around the box like a toddler with a tantrum..." it was one of the funniest but childishly pathetic things I had ever seen in a sporting arena - well done England's el-capitano. It is Sunday morning and having been up at 5am every day this week to txt A. at breakfast before her match (starting at 6.30am, UK time) and then picking her up at Heathrow yesterday (leaving here at 5.30am) I slept in today until 6am. The rest of the house is asleep and I am listening to William Byrd's - Ave Verum Corpus which is a pretty good way to start the day - see what you think.

FiftyFive

A. flew off to Bahrain yesterday morning and she seems to be quite relaxed about the tennis match she has tomrrow morning. Which is great but its just another reminder of passing time. Its not such a long time ago when I was ferrying her to Sutton, a big journey in those early days, to get some rating matches in. On a Saturday afterrnoon we would drive up for her to play two matches in a little tournament box of 4 (winners and losers of the first round played each other) then at night we would drive back the 50 miles in the dark, when she would sleep in the car, exhausted. We would usually get home about 10pm - she would head for a shower and bed, I'd head for food and match of the day. Now she has flown 3000 miles and is talking to us on Skype - soon to be laptop to laptop, hotel room to home and back again with webcam. Tonight she seemed fine, tired in the heat, 36 degrees but cold in the air conditioning. Her first match is 6.30am UK time - and I'll be up around 5.30am to send her a good luck text which she can read at breakfast. And then it will be a case of drinking Earl Grey tea and fretting - hoping she is fine, waiting on the call with the score that hopefully says she is in the next round - fingers crossed already. Still here's Elvis and Emmy telling you why my fingers are crossed. By the way, if you look at the picture at the side you will see I am sitting on a blanket which has been thrown over the chair - its a Mexican Wedding blanket I am told and I like it very much. Being colour blind, I like things that are bright and well contrasted so I can define the colours, and as usual, guitars are never far from hand in our house:

FiftyFive

Kilted is a rare sight but it does occur sometimes and this may be its one and only viewing on this site. But the kilted picture is displayed as an acknowledgement of Scotland and in this occassion Karine Polwart - the Scottish singer/songwriter - whose work I enjoy from time to time. She reminds me of a time past, when I used to travel with friends around Scotland, seeking out obscure wee folk venues and playing where we could. Eyemouth may not sound like the hub of Scottish music scene but there was a time when the Whale Inn there opened its doors to a lot of fun. It was a place I and others could play our songs and people would listen. I remember a story being told to me then, by a trawlerman. He said every Monday morning, when he left the harbour to sail out to work, he was seasick. What a way to start your working week. But he also said when he came back to shore, the first thing he would do was stroll into the Whale Inn for a pint of Belhaven ale to wash away the taste that had accumulated throughout the previous days - diesel fumes and salt and stale fish. And yet he would still come and hear me sing about places I would never go to (but hoped to) - a bit like this song clip (below) it would be a song full of hope - and I wonder what he is doing now, that trawlerman from Eyemouth, he would have been about nineteen then same as me, and about fifty-five now. I wonder if he is still trawling?

FiftyFive

A. is a tennis player - at this time of writing she is the current Number One U16 Girl in the UK. It is a huge achievement in dedication and hard work; and a great source of joy to this nearly 55 year old. In the summer she was photographed with top ranked, world class, Jelena Jankovich http://www.jelenajankovic.net/ at Eastbourne, after taking part in a coaching session. Just to see her here, smiling and dreaming that one day they will play against each other is such a nice image. And I certainly hope that it does happen for her - she certainly works hard enough at it. Even with full time schooling and gaining 10 GCSEs she spends around 25 hours a week on court and travels all over the world - yesterday it was Wrexham, next its Manama (Bahrain), before that Istanbul, the list goes on and long may it continue to please her, what a way to see the world. But when she returns she still has time for her kid brother. The other day she said, well some time in the future at least I will be able to say I am the former UK No 1... sounds good to me! Curiously, it might seem to some, but she is very fond of this band - and we often listen to them when driving to UK based tournaments. She may have been born in England but she has celtic roots: