Icarus flying home # 33

 

There she blows

I confess to two things today, the first is that I can't write the Monsters book. The second is that I have written it (I think). But when is a book written and not. I could do with another year to do both the Bogeyman and the Monsters and I promised myself I wouldn't write like I have again. But you know, I think that is what I do. I think and think and think and think and then I go wooosh - make the connections. I don't have a bone in my body that doesn't ache and a brain cell left to twist the tiddliest sense out of. Although today I did my first piece of artwork for the book. I wonder will it pass muster because you see I have a 100% record. I published my first ever song; academic article; film; picture book; poem; academic book... hoo I am running out of firsts so here is my first picture, I hope the publisher likes it, otherwise my days of firsts may be numbered, sigh... I think they already are. The picture is a pencil drawing of an oil well for my new book and the song, well we live by it... 
 

Icarus flying home # 32

Rockabilly boy

Coming across old pictures is a bit of a shock to the system and this one takes me back. I was living in London but had gone back to Scotland for a gig and a party. My quiff isn't quite as slicked back these days and my jeans are definately not this skinny but the memory is intact because I can remember this exactly. And I found the picture inside my old songbook, most of which I can still play, even though I haven't for years and years. Goodness, it doesn't seem such a long time ago. Seven years later I had a PhD and a new academic life, from rockabilly to sillybilly. Steve Earle in concert in your own living room - stick around for the second song - such a gem.

Icarus saying happy birthday # 2

Pressies

Well we finally got to say happy birthday properly. Presents and cake have to take second place to tennis but its a family thing and Dan loves it as much as the birthday people. And now look at them, 18 and 16 - hoo, where has the time gone, where indeed. And I was wondering what music could be added to this and there is only one I can think off that would get us all up and dancing. We dance to this in the car - don't ask. Skip the add and turn it up loud - are we human or are we dancer?

Icarus sings happy birthday Abbi # 1

Anything you can do...

Hooo - my Abbi is 18 and such a beautiful girl who puts up with her old dad being a wee bit daft. But that's what daughters do, they put up with us because they know that men are dafter than they are. Oooh but I love my little girl so and she has such plans for herself and boy will she do what she likes because that's how she has been brought up. Brought up to think and be herself and that's a good place to be as far as I am concerned. Happy birthday Abbi, happy birthday you, do you remember when your name was Abbi-boobie-loobi? Probably not but its when you used to call me Dado. X Me and Abbi love this band, The Four Brothers:

Icarus flying home # 31

I can see you there... cheeky minx

Kids these days, they have no respect for cameras. I remember the days when you had to take a film of 20 pics, send them away to get developed and then rue the day when somebody did something daft, like sticking their tongue out. But now, just sitting at my laptop as I am (see pic above) we can just create the instant picture, no hassle and no sense. This picture was taken ten minutes before I wrote this - how's that for speedpic. Think we look similar - its the boss eyes that do it. But even pulling a face she is a bit of a beaut, even if I say so myself. Its been a fraught week but I have come through it and I know that I have made a good decision, which, if truth be known I should have made it before and that is my fault. But you know, life is and has been good to me but we are never stars in our own eyes, just making do and getting on and fronting up our ghosts just like everyone else... Abbi is my star tennis player but my better star girl and she is counting down the days to womanhood and being eighteen: we like this song and we haven't heard it for a while.

Icarus flying home # 30

17

A friend wrote to me about my Monsters dilemma and  she replied, 'her wants are in conflict with your needs never easy plus you get to go on living...' phew. My daughter  Abbi has been such an inspiration on this and she said, 'You are not a bad man so don't let bad thoughts make you feel bad..' Hoooo - how did she get so wise at 17. You wouldn't have known me at 17. I was playing rock & roll and playing football and being the man (laughs to himself). This song says more than I can explain. Who would be seventeen again, not me. Then again 20, or 21, or 51, gotta laugh and I haven't laughed in a long time. I hate letting people down but I realised something very important: there is a part of all of us that wants to give everyone what they want, but unfortunately we just can't, hmm, Nina Simone all over again - see earlier posts. But I can't complain. I wrote to a friend the other day about writing, and I realised that while I am writing under the cosh right now (for reasons) I am actually writing my 31st book. Oooh, if you had asked me once, anytime, I would have said I would like to write a book. But I would never have considered writing so many words...  I am embarrassed to say... I never meant to guv, i just couldn't help myself... once you start well, it just gets to be a habit, know what I mean, snifff... (with 3 fs). This is about being 17 for my Abbi who will turn 18 well too soon and still so wise.